The best Couples therapy Exercises

Couple’s therapy seems like such a scary combination of words. It may be hard to accept, let alone voice that you may need help. It seems like a sign of giving up, of waving the white flag in defeat. However, we need to begin looking at couples therapy as a helpful tool to help navigate the difficult landscape that are relationships. In this blog post, we will cover some of the best couples therapy exercises. These are little exercises that you can try at home, or that may be brought up in your couples counselling session.

1. Reflective listening

One of the best ways to improve your relationship, is to improve your communication. A large part of communication is active listening. Reflective listening techniques are a great exercise to help a couple become active listeners.

What do you have to do? When discussing problems, try to use “I” sentences rather than “You” sentences. This turns the conversation to your own feelings, rather than putting blame on the other member of your couple. As an example, you can say “I feel sad when you do X” rather than “You’re wrong when you do X”.

2. Gottman method

The Gottman method is used to help couples deepen their understanding of one another. At the same time, it is used to help manage conflict within the relationship.

What do you have to do? Work with your counsellor by opening and being vulnerable. You will learn how to build love maps, share fondness and admiration, turn towards instead of away, build positive perspectives, manage conflict, and make life dreams come true.

3. Emotionally focused therapy

Emotionally focused therapy is a method that has been used to help improve adult relationships. It targets the loving bonds created between individuals and helps strengthen them.

What do you have to do? Break your patterns of dealing with your partner negatively by identifying underlying fears in relationships. With the help of your counsellors, you can address any attachment related insecurities. As a result, you can interact with your partner in a more responsive, emotionally connected, and loving way.

4. Narrative Therapy

Narrative therapy works by people describing their problems in a story form and working to rewrite the narrative. This works because they will see that no single story can be the whole reason for their experience.

What do you have to do? Narrative therapy can help you as a couple see the many variables that build up the story of a relationship. You can take a step back away from the emotional trauma of believing you are the reason for the failure or the thought that you deserve it.

5. Solution-Focused Therapy

Your relationship may experience a particular problem, or you and your partner may want to work towards a specific goal. In this case, solution focused therapy can be the best therapy for you.

What do you have do? You will create short term goal focused plans. This therapy is designed to building solutions with your partner and leaving the problems in the past.